Effective Ways to Discipline Your Team (Without Hurting Your Relationships)

Disciplining employees doesn’t come naturally to everyone. But it’s an essential skill for any manager. Here are some ways to provide needed employee discipline without damaging your relationships with your team members.

Keep It Private

Never call out an employee in public. This will only lead to shame, defensiveness, and a loss of trust. Instead, keep all disciplinary meetings behind closed doors.

Ask HR to Join

While it’s not generally necessary for minor issues, involving HR is key if more serious allegations are involved. Examples include, but are not limited to:

  • Theft
  • Sexual harassment
  • Drug or alcohol abuse
  • Escalating issues such as worsening tardiness or frequently calling in sick

As a general rule of thumb, if the alleged behavior involves actions toward another person, a problem that is worsening, or a fireable offense, it’s a good idea to get HR involved right away.

Seek Understanding

Remember that many situations are not as cut and dried as they first appear. Even in the most serious situations, your employees have earned the benefit of the doubt. Always start with open-ended, clarifying questions that give your team member the chance to explain their behavior and the intention behind it.

Focus on Constructive Criticism

There is nothing to be gained by tearing someone down. If you cross the line into abusive language, you could end up being the one in trouble. Focus solely on the behavioral issue and steps to correct it. Don’t veer into anything that gives the appearance of a personal attack.

Work Together

Engage your employee in coming up with a plan for improvement, assuming that the behavior isn’t immediately fireable. For example, if the issue is excessive tardiness, ask them to come up with three ways they could change their morning routine. This shows trust in their judgment and can help keep them on board. Work together to create a written action plan that includes a timeline for following up.

Take Notes

Thoroughly document any employee discipline. Always take detailed notes and send a copy to the worker. Follow up as agreed upon, using your shared notes as objective criteria for determining how well the employee implemented changes. Keeping a paper trail helps to minimize the risk of confusion. It also provides ongoing documentation in case the issue is not resolved.

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